As I’ve navigated the life of asymmetric faith, I’ve wondered about something. If churches really are focused on a relationship with Jesus, and leading their people to do the same, why wouldn’t they be asymmetric? Why aren’t they focused on the things that produce that fruit instead of focused on membership and tithe amounts? Why are they focused on making sure that they keep parishioners inline with their dictates? Or working to have the latest and greatest whatever? Why are the pastors so controlling instead of one of the followers and lovers of Jesus?
I’ve been a part churches for roughly 50 years. They’ve ranged sizes, denominations, states, and even countries. Some were certainly better than others. For the ones that were particularly troubling, there were inept and controlling pastors, turf battles, and misaligned focus. Some pastors had to be the “boss” and were not to be questioned. You were treated as if you somehow hated Jesus to question them or had a difference of opinion. I had a pastor, on whose staff I served, that if I was not sitting on the front row, he would search the crowd until he found me to make sure I was in my place. When churches become the family business or about creating a fiefdom, things go awry.
So, if churches are supposed to be about “Kingdom purposes” and helping to draw people to relationship with Jesus, why would they not be about eschewing the trappings of the institutional church?
The answer is probably that it’s not easy to be asymmetric when the culture recognizes the model of church a particular way. I have worked with many ministries over the years and many were following patterns that work for others just to stay afloat financially. Seth Godin, the best-selling author and speaker, talks about it like this: “People like us do things like this.” In other words, when we’re part of a group, we do things like the group to maintain the semblance of normalcy. To that end, churches do things like churches because that’s what churches do.
To tear away everything but being the body and bride of Christ is not easy. We have almost two millennia of doing church a way that is different from the first century where the focus was loving Jesus and loving others. It’s a steep climb to get away from the institutional culture.
However, if a church really wants to be focused on relationship with Jesus again, they might look at doing the following:
- Stop looking at parishioners as people to be “controlled into relationship with Jesus.” True relationship is not about manipulating people into loving.
- Don’t give them a fake church job. This is related to the first point. All too often, churches develop jobs at church during services to keep people attached to the church. Greeters at the doors, people to collect the offering, etc. Instead, why not help them focus on loving the community around them with work out in the community?
- Stop the disparity. Break down the “professional ministry” structure. I get it. Even in the first century, the disciples set up people that could take care of initiatives that they did not have time to do. However, the idea of being “in ministry” is an idol for some and a barrier to actually being a minister for others. EVERYONE IS A MINISTER!! EVERYONE should be showing the love of Jesus to others.
- Remove the money focus. Not every church is this way. However, I was part of the staff of one church (that was very short-lived) where they often had an “offertory sermon,” a teaching to go along with the giving part of the service. That portion was sometimes longer than the regular sermon. Yes, it does take money to accomplish some things. However, when the focus is on money that leads to accommodating the expensive lifestyle of the head pastor, a lifestyle that most parishioners could not live, something has gone terribly wrong.
- Recognize that the church is not the center of parishioner’s lives. It should be Jesus. The fellowship of church is an extra (provided it is healthy). If people aren’t at church, perhaps they are connecting with others that need the light of Jesus in their life. Also, if what you’re offering in the church is not valuable enough for them to attend, why should they attend?
- Train people. REALLY train them to digest the Word of Truth rightly. Don’t spoon feed them catchy phrases in a three-point sermon that usually gets forgotten. Train them how to be in relationship with Jesus on a daily basis.
- Stop the show. I like good music. I play the drums and I like rhythm. However, too often, the “worship” portion of the service becomes just a stage show. Good musical performers without a lick of sense in leading people to real worship of Jesus.
- Evaluate traditions, practices, and beliefs. I was part of the Assemblies of God for a number of years. They have a number of theological positions that I really struggle with these days. As an example, drinking alcohol is one of them. The AG hold that it is anti-biblical and wrong to drink (sin). I even asked another AG friend once about Jesus drinking wine and turning water to wine and his response was that it was “unfermented.” Perhaps, he should look up the definition of wine. Personally, I do not drink alcohol for family (too many alcoholics in the family) and health reasons (fatty liver). However, I do not have a problem from a Biblical perspective as there are many examples of drinking in the Bible. There are a few exceptions to drinking that I take. Like anything, were I a drinker, I would not want to do something that caused another to fall. However, that is an expansive subject of what I would try to avoid in front of someone to keep them from falling. The Bible does talk about not getting drunk. So I can say that is good practice. All that said, look at your “cultural norms” within our churches and see what is not supported Biblically.
To be clear, nothing in the list above should become a dogmatic perspective that keeps people from having relationship with Jesus. That is and always should be the focus.
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